Chapter 76
Lucian’s gentle voice softened further as he looked into Rose’s eyes, a sad smile playing at his lips. “Look, Rose, I’ll do whatever makes you and the family feel at peace,” he said quietly, each word carefully chosen, as though speaking any louder would cause the fragile moment to shatter. He took a shaky breath before continuing, his gaze flickering, his vulnerability evident as he tried to hold himself together. “But before I go… could you do me just one favor?”
Rose felt her heart stutter, her throat tightening as she fought back a flood of emotions. His request caught her off guard, and though she tried to keep her composure, she could feel her control slipping. She hadn’t heard Lucian ask anything of her in what felt like an eternity, and now, faced with the weight of his gentle plea, she was left speechless. His sad, almost resigned tone made it all the harder to bear.
A thousand thoughts raced through her mind—she still needed to tell him that she couldn’t let him go, that she wouldn’t let him walk away from the family. But she found herself hanging on his words, waiting to hear whatever it was he needed from her, this one last request that carried a weight she could hardly fathom. It was as though he was laying his heart bare, giving her the last piece of himself, hoping she wouldn’t turn away.
“What… what is it?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper, her throat tightening with unspoken apologies, regret, and hope. She would give him anything, absolutely anything, just to make up for the lost time, for all the pain she’d caused. Even if it meant undoing years of distrust, of resentment, she would find a way to do it.
Lucian hesitated for a moment, his eyes searching hers as though he was looking for an answer he already feared. He drew in a breath, trying to steady himself. “Rose… if my presence is really making things uncomfortable for the family,” he began, his voice wavering but still managing to hold that gentleness, that kindness he couldn’t seem to let go of, “if it’s truly best that I stay away… I’m willing to leave.”
Rose’s heart plummeted at his words, the air seeming to vanish from the room as she processed what he was saying. The thought of him leaving, truly disappearing from her life, shattered her heart. She wanted to scream, to reach out and hold onto him, to tell him she didn’t want him to leave, that she had been wrong, terribly wrong. But her voice seemed to be stuck in her throat, her thoughts tumbling over each other, overwhelmed by the fear of losing him again.
“I know things haven’t… worked out between us,” he continued, his voice breaking slightly as he tried to maintain his calm. “And maybe we’ll never be comfortable around each other, maybe things are too broken to be fixed… but if I could just ask one thing” he swallowed, a flash of raw pain crossing his face as he struggled to get the words out, “could you, please, not hate me?”
Rose’s breath caught in her chest. His request was so simple, yet the vulnerability behind it struck her like a physical blow. He wasn’t asking for love, or even for her understanding just for her not to hate him. She could see how much he had struggled to say those words, how much of himself he had put on the line to ask for something that shouldn’t even have needed asking.
He turned his head slightly, looking away as though he couldn’t bear to meet her gaze any longer, as if afraid he might see rejection in her eyes. “It’s okay if you don’t feel close to me,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t expect anything. But I just… I don’t want to be hated. atleast Not by you.” He let out a soft, self-deprecating chuckle, as if laughing at his own foolishness. “That’s it. That’s all I wanted.”
Rose felt her throat tighten painfully, her mind replaying every bitter word she had ever said to him, every moment she had pushed him away, ignored him, acted as though he was nothing. The guilt pressed down on her, almost suffocating. She had been blind to his pain, too wrapped up in her own insecurities and resentment to see the gentleness he had hidden beneath his quiet demeanor. And now, hearing him ask for something as small as this, she realized just how deep his hurt must have run, how he had been carrying it all alone.
“Lucian…” she choked out, her voice trembling. Her hands shook as she reached out, her heart breaking at the thought of him feeling like he didn’t deserve even the smallest kindness, the faintest glimmer of affection. He looked back at her then, his eyes filled with a quiet sadness, a sadness so profound it nearly brought her to tears. She could see the resignation there, the acceptance of what he thought he deserved, and it tore her apart.
“I’m serious, Rose,” he continued softly, his tone gentle but firm. “If it’s better for you… if it’s better for everyone, I’ll step away. I’m willing to go, to be out of your life for good if that’s what you need.” He gave her a small, sad smile, a shadow of the warmth he had always tried to show her, even when she had pushed him away. “But just… don’t hate me.”
He turned his gaze downward, a flicker of pain crossing his face. “If you want,” he added quietly, “I can call the lawyer right now. We can make it official. I’ll give you everything, Rose. The name, the inheritance, the freedom you want… I don’t need any of it.”
Rose couldn’t take it anymore. Seeing him ready to erase himself from her life, to sever the last ties they had simply to give her what he thought she wanted, shattered her resolve. “Lucian… please, don’t,” she whispered, her voice breaking as she struggled to hold back her tears. Her hands clutched at the coffee cup so tightly her knuckles turned white. She felt her carefully constructed composure slipping away, her heart unraveling with each word he spoke.