Chapter 148
The palace gardens were quiet at twilight.
Most of the court had retired to prepare for the evening meal. The servants were in the kitchens. The guards were changing shifts. Only the night jasmine and the fountain kept company with Lysa and Captain Rowan as they walked the winding path between the hedges.
“We shouldn’t be here,” Lysa said, though she made no move to leave.
“The gardens are open to everyone p>
“You know what I mean.” She glanced back at the palace. “People talk. And after the peace accord, tensions are still high. A human attendant walking with a wolf captain p>
“Is exactly what the accord was supposed to protect.” Rowan stopped and turned to face her. “You’re not a servant anymore, Lysa. You’re the queen’s personal attendant. You have a title. A room in the noble wing. You belong here p>
“It doesn’t feel like belonging. It feels like… borrowing. Like someone will tap me on the shoulder and tell me there’s been a mistake p>
Rowan’s expression softened. He reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear—a gesture so gentle it made her chest ache.
“No one is going to tap you on the shoulder. You’ve earned your place. Through courage. Through loyalty. Through staying when others ran.” His hand lingered near her cheek. “I’ve been wanting to say that for weeks. Months, maybe p>
Lysa’s heart pounded. “Rowan p>
“I know. It’s fast. It’s complicated. You’re human. I’m wolf. The whole kingdom is watching.” He stepped closer. “But I don’t care about any of that. I care about you p>
The first kiss was soft.
Tentative. His lips brushed hers like he was afraid she might break. Lysa’s hands rose to his chest, not pushing him away, just… holding on. The world narrowed to the warmth of his mouth, the scent of his skin, the steady beat of his heart beneath her palms.
Then a voice squeaked, “Oh! I’m sorry p>
They sprang apart.
A young servant stood at the end of the path, her face bright red, a basket of linens clutched to her chest. “I was just—the laundry—I needed to get to the—I didn’t mean to p>
“It’s fine,” Lysa said, her own face burning. “We were just… talking p>
“Talking,” Rowan echoed, though his ears were practically glowing.
The servant bobbed a curtsy and fled down the path, nearly tripping over her own feet.
Lysa buried her face in her hands. “That’s going to be all over the palace by morning p>
“Probably p>
“Everyone is going to know p>
“Probably p>
She looked up at him. “And you’re not worried p>
Rowan smiled; a real smile, not the guarded expression he wore on duty. “Let them know. Let them talk. I’m not ashamed of caring about you p>
From a window in the palace, Seren watched.
She had seen the whole thing—the approach, the kiss, the interruption. Lysa’s flustered retreat. Rowan’s dopey grin.
Beside her, Aeron snorted. “He’s got it bad p>
“He’s in love p>
“Same thing p>
Seren turned from the window. “Did you know? About them p>
“I suspected.” Kael shrugged. “Rowan’s been finding excuses to patrol the gardens for weeks. I thought he was looking for threats. Turns out the threat was your attendant p>
“She’s not a threat. She’s my best friend p>
“To him, she’s everything p>
Seren smiled. “Good p>
That night, Lysa came to Seren’s chambers.
She was still flushed, still flustered, still unable to meet Seren’s eyes.
“I’m not going to ask,” Seren said.
“Good p>
“Because I already know p>
Lysa groaned. “Did everyone see p>
“Just me. And Aeron. And probably the guards on the east tower. And the cook’s assistant who was picking herbs.” Seren counted on her fingers. “So maybe half the palace p>
“I want to die p>
“Sit down.” Seren guided her to a chair. “Tell me what happened. Not the kiss—I saw that. Tell me what you’re feeling p>
Lysa was silent for a long moment.
“Terrified,” she admitted. “I’ve seen what happens to human women who love wolves. My mother. The woman in the village. The ones who trusted and were betrayed. Beaten. Discarded. Killed p>
Her voice cracked.
“I promised myself I would never love a wolf. That I would never be that vulnerable. That I would keep my head down and my heart closed p>
“And now p>
“Now there’s Rowan.” She looked up. “He’s not like the others. He’s kind. Patient. He sees me—not as a human, not as a servant, just… *me*. And I don’t know how to handle that p>
Seren sat beside her.
“I was terrified too,” she said. “When the bond first snapped into place. When I realized, I was tied to three wolves who could destroy me with a thought p>
“You had the bond p>
“The bond didn’t make it less scary. It made it *more* scary. Because I couldn’t walk away. I couldn’t pretend I didn’t care.” She took Lysa’s hand. “But I also couldn’t imagine my life without them. The fear didn’t disappear. It just… made room for other things. Trust. Joy. Love p>
Lysa’s eyes glistened. “What if he hurts me p>
“Then I’ll hurt him. Kael will help p>
That startled a laugh out of Lysa. “You’re terrible p>
“I’m practical.” Seren squeezed her hand. “Rowan is not like the other wolves. He proved that at the border. He proved it when he defended the school. He proves it every day by treating you like you matter p>
“He does p>
“Then let yourself be loved. Be terrified, if you need to. But don’t let fear steal something beautiful p>
Lysa leaned her head on Seren’s shoulder.
“Since when did you get so wise p>
“Since I married three idiots who taught me that love is worth the risk p>
The next morning, Lysa found Rowan in the training yard.
He was sparring with a practice dummy, his movements precise, controlled. When he saw her, he stopped.
“Lysa p>
“Rowan p>
They stood there, awkward, neither sure what to say.
Finally, Lysa stepped forward.
“I’m terrified,” she said. “Of loving a wolf. Of getting hurt. Of losing myself p>
Rowan’s expression didn’t change. “I know p>
“But I’m more terrified of losing *you p>
She kissed him.
Not soft this time. Not tentative. A real kiss, in front of the entire training yard, with guards and servants and nobles watching.
When she pulled back, Rowan was grinning.
“That’s going to be all over the palace by morning p>
“Probably p>
“And you’re not worried p>
Lysa smiled. “Let them talk p>
She walked away, her heart pounding, her cheeks burning.
But she wasn’t afraid anymore.