Chapter 148
Dominic
Right on my screen are the videos and pictures I took of Vanessa and I during our honeymoon. I can’t seem to understand why I never permanently deleted the folder. Could it be because it was so unimportant to me back then that I didn’t care how I discarded it? I lean back in my seat to check each one, starting with the pictures and with each one that I click on, the fake smiles on our faces make me chuckle softly. I was ready to do anything back then to seem convincing to our parents but here I am today, not having to fake my smile anymore as my feelings have changed, but I still don’t know how to describe them.
The first video I play is the one I’m kissing Vanessa and since this is the raw footage, nothing is edited out and I watch myself scold her, giving her instructions on how it should be done. And there she is, boldly talking back, making me scoff at how she’s always been this way.
While watching myself kiss her, I remember that I only wanted to mess with her that day. What surprises me is the look on her face when I pull away from her lips. The way she looks at me in the footage is the same way she looks at me today. How did I not see this back then? Is it because I didn’t want to pay much attention to her?
As I continue to watch how we faked it all, I shake my head at how things have changed since I no longer have to give her instructions on how we’ll kiss or hold each other. I only need to hold out my hand and she naturally comes to me until it leads to me fucking her. The thought of it brings back memories from earlier, when she was riding me for the first time. How the fuck did she do that? Was it all because of what Carmella said to her? In the past, I never let anyone get on top of me unless I thought they were so special that I wanted them to take charge. As for Vanessa, I want to see her do it again and again.
Suddenly, she switches sleeping positions and I quickly click off the folder even though she won’t be able to see what I’m looking at on time. I then ask myself whether or not to delete this footage but in the end, why should I delete it? No matter how it all started out, this was still my honeymoon.
I could always edit everything else out and only keep the parts that show that we were in love, but it’s not the truth. This is our truth and I’d like to show it to her.
–
The next three days are filled with more exploration and adventures as everyone tries to make this memorable for my father-in-law and they all equally enjoy it.
While in the middle of a meal with everyone by the beach, I receive a call from Carmella but I ignore it, only for her to call again. I even put my phone on silent and just before I shove it back in my pocket, I receive a message from her. “Pick up right now or you’re going to regret it! I fucking mean it!”
Irritated, I subtly clench my jaw then excuse myself for a moment. Vanessa furrows her eyebrows with concern and it seems she can already tell that something is wrong with me.
As much as I would want to do as I please and ignore Carmella, Vanessa’s words have stuck with me. Carmella is still a ticking time bomb, especially now that she can’t have me how she wants me.
Just when I’m about to call her, she calls me again and I pick up, quickly walking further away from everyone else.
“What is it?” I say to her.
“Still spending time with that walking corpse?” she says from the other end of the line.
“Do you think it’s funny when you always say that?”
“Oh, babe, did I tell any lies? Isn’t he a walking corpse?”
I stop in my tracks, unable to take it anymore. “You know what? Fuck you!”
I hang up on her with a grunt, then ruffle my hair to calm down but it does nothing for me.
With hurried footsteps, I make my way back in my previous direction but before I can get too close, Vanessa approaches me with concern. “Hey, is everything okay?” she asks.
I stop right in front of her, my heart racing as my shoulders rise and fall rapidly.
“Hey, you need to calm down.” She gently places her hand on my chest.
It takes me a few seconds but I sigh deeply. I could never appreciate it enough how she always knows that something is wrong with me.
“Who was it? Shane?” She raises her eyebrows.
“No. It was Carmella.”
“Oh, what did she want?”
I poke my cheek. “You don’t want to know.”
The last thing I want is for Vanessa to find out just what Carmella said as it’ll only hurt her.
As we head back to join the others, she tells me about the calls she made to the orphanage and children’s hospital to check if everything was alright. The more she talks about it all, the more it makes me forget about Carmella until I’m so calm that no one notices anything different about me by the time we join everyone else.
After this evening, the only ones who will still be here are Vanessa and I since everyone else has to go back. It’s for this reason that my father-in-law makes a toast to thank everyone for making it special. Though I can see the joy on his face, I also sense a hint of sadness. I chose not to tell Vanessa about his condition the other day since I didn’t want to worry her.
It doesn’t matter how many times he says nothing can be done about his condition. Seeing him so full of life and having fun makes me want to try and I’ll find a way.
What brings me back to the present moment is when my father-in-law taps me on the shoulder and quietly asks about my relationship with Patrick. No matter how I look at this, he doesn’t need to know everything that happened, so I still make it look like everything’s great. “I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again,” he says, looking right at Vanessa as she mingles with Sophie and Jake. “She might’ve been happy when she was with Patrick, but this is the happiest she’s ever been. May her love for you only grow deeper.”
I look right at Vanessa as she smiles and I begin to wonder. There have been times when I can’t tell if she’s acting or she actually means it. There’s never been a need to act like we’re in love when it’s just the two of us, yet the way she looks at me while others are around is the same way she looks at me without them present. Am I wrong to assume it’s all real?
Vanessa
Shopping with Mia is always fun, but today is even better and more interesting since I haven’t seen her in three weeks.
“Hmm, I’m trying to think of who in this world is as special as I am!” She shimmies her shoulders as we walk up the stairs of the luxury store.
“Let me guess…no one?” I playfully raise my eyebrows in curiosity.
“Exactly!” She brags. “It’s been less than twenty four hours since you returned from the trip and you must be exhausted, but here you are, accompanying me to personally buy those heels Frank offered to pay for.”
I huff, stopping in my tracks halfway up the stairs. “It’s still crazy to me that it had to be this particular luxury store.”
“Wait, is something wrong?” She narrows her eyes. “This is the third time you’ve said it since we were on the private jet.”
“Oh, it’s nothing.” I wave my hand dismissively, unable to tell her that the only reason I’ve said it so much is because Carmella lives right in this town. Changing the subject, I say, “It seems you’re enjoying how Frank is spending his money on you a little too much. Be careful or you’ll fall for him.” She bursts into laughter. “That’ll never be me! He’s a great fuck, funny, understanding and all that but the amount of girls who walk up to us and claim to be going out with him is a major red flag for me.”
“Then just walk away.”
“Oh, I definitely will, right after I wear those gorgeous heels!”
We both burst into laughter as we head to the elevator. While inside, I can sense her directly looking at me even though she’s next to me.
“Is there something on your mind?” I ask.
“Nothing really. It’s just that I haven’t seen you in person for three weeks and there’s this beautiful glow about you. I only have one person to thank for that.” She curves her hand on the side of her mouth and whispers, “It’s Dominic!”
I chuckle and she instantly teases me.
“Aww, you’re blushing.”
“Shut up.” I playfully smack her shoulder.
In the middle of our playful banter, the elevator doors open and my enthusiasm instantly fades as I come face to face with Carmella, her presence alone already something I can’t stand.