Chapter 77
Chapter 77
ARIA
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“Still,” Ivory said, and now she was looking down at her hands, fidgeting with the edge of her blanket. “I need to maintain proper decorum. Especially since… well p>
She fell silent, but there was something in her posture that suggested she wanted to say more.
“What is it?” Nina asked gently. “What’s wrong p>
Ivory was quiet for a long moment, then spoke in a voice so soft I had to strain to hear it.
“I think I need to leave the pack p>
The words dropped into the room like stones into still water. Nina’s face went white. Through our bond, I felt Kael’s shock.
“Leave?” Nina repeated. “Ivory, you can’t be serious. This is your home. Your pack. You’ve lived here your entire life p>
“And in that entire life, I’ve managed to accumulate a lot of bad luck,” Ivory said quietly. Her fingers traced the bandage on her head, then moved to touch the healing claw marks visible on her arms. “First Damon attacked me during the bonding ceremony. Fractured my skull, broken my nose, severe concussion. Then I poisoned myself with that compound testing- nearly died from that too. And now this. Rogue wolves, more head trauma, another near-death experience p>
She looked up, meeting Nina’s eyes. “Three times, Nina. Three times in less than two weeks I’ve nearly died. That’s not normal. That’s not just bad luck. That’s a pattern. And I’m starting to think that maybe the universe is trying to tell me something p>
“You’re not thinking clearly,” Nina said, her voice desperate. “You have a head injury. You’ve lost memories. You can’t make major life decisions like this right now p>
“Can’t I?” Ivory.asked. “Because it seems pretty clear to me. Every time I try to help, every time. I put myself out there for this pack, I end up broken and bleeding. Maybe I’m not meant to be here anymore. Maybe I’m not meant to be a healer for Shadowmere p>
“That’s ridiculous,” Kael said, speaking for the first time since Ivory’s announcement. “Ivory, you’re one of the most valued members of this pack. You’ve saved countless lives. The fact that you’ve been injured doesn’t mean you should leave-it means we need to protect you better p>
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Chapter 77
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But Ivory was shaking her head. “I don’t want to be protected, Alpha Kael. I don’t want to live my life under guard surveillance, always looking over my shoulder, always wondering when the next attack will come. I want…” She trailed off, seeming to struggle with what she wanted.
“You want what?” I asked, speaking for the first time since Jason had left.
Ivory’s gaze moved to me, and that instinctive dislike flashed across her face again. Even without her memories, even not knowing why, she still didn’t want me around.
“I want peace,” she finally said. “I want to heal without wondering if I’m going to end up
back in this clinic as a patient instead of a healer. I want to do my work without political complications and revenge plots and whatever mess the pack is currently tangled up in p>
“The mess you think I brought,” I said quietly, finally voicing what we were all thinking.
Ivory met my eyes steadily. “I don’t remember enough to know whose fault anything is. I just know that I’m tired. Tired of being hurt. Tired of feeling unsafe in my own pack lands. Tired of waking up in the clinic more often than not p>
She looked back at Nina. “I’m not making any final decisions right now. Eliza’s right—I shouldn’t make major life choices with a head injury. But I need you to understand that I’m seriously considering it. That maybe leaving is the right choice for me. For my own safety and sanity p>
Nina looked like she wanted to argue more, but Eliza stepped in.
“This conversation is over for now,” she said firmly. “Ivory needs rest, not stressful discussions about her future. Everyone out. You can visit again tomorrow, but for now, my patient needs sleep p>
We were ushered out, Nina protesting the entire way. Once in the hallway, Kael pulled Nina aside to try to calm her down, leaving me standing alone, processing everything I’d just witnessed.
Ivory didn’t remember loving Kael, didn’t remember their friendship. But she still instinctively disliked me. Still blamed me, on some level, for the chaos in her life. Still wanted distance from whatever complications my presence represented.
And now she was talking about leaving. About abandoning the pack she’d served her entire life because staying had become too dangerous, too painful, too exhausting.
I thought about what she’d said about bad luck. About patterns. About the universe trying to tell her something.
But maybe it wasn’t the universe. Maybe it was simpler than that.
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11:48 Thu, Dec 18
Chapter 77
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Maybe it was just me. My presence. My baggage. My inability to escape my past cleanly enough to avoid dragging others down with me.
The guilt that had been a constant companion since the rogue attack intensified. Because if Ivory left, if she felt forced out of her home because being here had become too dangerous, that would be on me too.
One more consequence of my choices. One more person hurt because I’d accepted Kael’s offer, bonded with him, brought my complicated history into their stable pack.
I heard Nina’s voice from down the hall, thick with tears as she spoke to Kael. Heard him trying to reassure her, trying to convince her that Ivory wouldn’t really leave, that she just needed time to heal and remember and feel safe again.
But I wasn’t so sure. Ivory had always been someone who acted rather than wallowed. If she decided leaving was the right choice, she would leave. Memory loss or not. Head injury or not.
And the pack would lose their best healer, their beloved pack member, the person who’d proven her dedication over and over again.
While I-the Luna who’d been here less than two weeks-would remain. The complication. The liability. The person whose presence had somehow cost them so much already.
The irony wasn’t lost on me.
And neither was the crushing weight of responsibility for how spectacularly wrong everything had gone since I’d arrived at Shadowmere.
11:49 Thu, Dec 18
Chapter 78
Mark