Chapter 458

Beau
He is here.
In front of me and it is real.
There is this part of my heart that only responds when I am close to Lanis and he is in my arms right now. He is alive and back to normal.
His scent is the same as it was before he was pregnant. His skin is pale again. His hands are cold. He is back to the Lanis that I remember and I am not saying I didn’t like him the way he was when he was pregnant but this is the man I fell in love with. Vampire Alanis.
I am scared to let him go. I have been holding him for a while now and I can feel him want to let go. I know what he wants–or rather, who he wants right now. Our miracles, in their cribs. They are quiet but my heart is with them. I can feel them, just the same way I feel Lanis. There is this bond that I will never lose.
One that I don’t ever want to lose. I love both of them so much.
I feel Lanis pull away. I let go of him and he smiles at me.
He doesn’t say anything else to more and I don’t need words. I know what he wants to do. I watch him as he walks to the crib and places his hands on the top. He is lingering and I completely understand. That is how I felt when I first came in here. He is the one that brought them into the world. The bond he must have with them has to be stronger.
He turns to me and his eyes are the same as ever. That sparkle I fall into when he looks at me. The look that makes me want to give him all of me.
“They are beautiful,’’ he whispers.
I nod, “Yes they are.”
I walk over to him and he turns back to them. I haven’t given them names, I haven’t done anything but hold them and feed them. I have been waiting for him to wake up. I wanted us to do it all together.
“I want to hold them, can I?’’ he asks me even though he doesn’t even need to ask. They are our babies.
He doesn’t need to ask me.
I am already walking over to the cribs. I reach in and take one of them out.
“Which one would you like?’’ I ask him, looking at him over my shoulder with a smile on my face. He rolls his eyes from my teasing.
“Can I have them both?’’ he asks with a gleam.
I smile even bigger.
I place the one I have in my arms in his. I reach back in and get the other one. I hold her in my arms and look at him and he is looking at him. His eyes are full of love and I am overwhelmed by it. I watch him as he plants a soft kiss on his forehead, my heart beating to the sight in front of me.
He looks up at me, his eyes are twinkling and he smiles.
“He is my baby,’’ he exclaims. I nod my head and move closer to him “They both are, you made them.’’ I remind him and a memory that was so confusing and problematic has suddenly become the most beautiful memory in my life. The day I found out he was pregnant. The things that did to me. I just love every bit of our journey together. There have been hard times but the good times top all the bad times.
Every painful thing, every hurt, suddenly feels so inconsequential.
“Hi baby,’’ he whispers into his ears, laying kisses on his temple. He tilts his head forward and looks at the one in my arm “Hi you, I am you dad, you are my baby.”
He smiles.
I smile at him and he looks up at me. The love in his eyes is so beautiful. I can feel it so strongly. He loves me and these babies. I am watching his love for them.
“They are my babies,” he repeats and I switch babies with him, wanting him to hold the other one.
“Is it weird that I already know who they are…you know, from the dreams.’’ he looks at me as he rocks the baby in his arms back to sleep.
I smile because I felt the same way when I held them in my arms. Just looking at their faces, I know who Colin is and I know who Colt is.
“No, it is perfect.”
He looks at me and his eyes are so beautiful.
“It is perfect,” he repeats.
I smile and kiss him gently. He kisses me back with so much passion.
Our babies are in our arms and our love is in the air.
“We are perfect,” he whispers and I kiss him again. The door opens and we both look at Ogma as she stands in front of the door with a smile on her face.
“You are awake,’’ she exclaims, still smiling.
I glance at Lanis and he nods “Yes I am.’’
She walks closer to us and stops in front of him “I want to examine you, make sure everything is fine. Is that okay?”
He nods immediately and I smile.
She takes him out of the room and I am left alone with them. I look down at them and I can’t help but smile. They are so beautiful. I have never been a children person. I have never even thought of myself as a father. A year ago, I was still a stupid teenager. Hell, I am still a teenager but I have them now.
I am going to be better for them.
I am going to give them everything they need. I am going to be there for them. I am going to be good for them.
I am going to be their daddy.
I am going to love them.
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