Chapter 479

Jabi
Eligio parks his car in the parking lot of the apartment and turns to me with a comforting smile on his face “He will be alright. don’t you worry about anything,’’ he tries to assure me but it is not working.
Everything is messed up because I let Lenny into our lives. I don’t even know why I was fighting so hard. It is not like I was desperate for a friend. Yes, I wanted a friend but thinking about it all now, is it worth it?
Was giving Lenny my number and inviting him over to the house a good call. I saw it in Darrien’s eyes. He didn’t really want to give in but in the end, he did it for me and I manipulated him into agreeing. I used the fact that he would do anything for me to make him agree to it and now it has all backfired.
Now, I am left in the dark because of how immature I am. How naive I was to think that Lenny was a good person.
I should have trusted Dar; he didn’t trust the guy and the fact that he had doubts should have been enough for me.
“Thanks,” I manage because I don’t even have the energy to act like I am okay. I know he can tell and I have been feeling very faint all day.
I don’t know why.
He lets me get down from the car and I go up the elevator, till I get to the apartment. I already know he is not here. His scent is nowhere close to me and maybe coming here was not the best idea. I don’t know what to do, I just want to have him in my arms again. I want to apologize to him again and I never want to have anything to do with Lenny.
I walk into the apartment and it is dark.
The lights are off and somehow, I don’t even want to put them on. I just want him to come home. I walk over to the couch in the living room and sit on the side facing the door. The distance from the living room to the door is not far. Our place is comfy and cozy. it is usually just us in the confinement of this small space and I liked it so much. My hands cover my face as I try to stay strong, try to stop worrying.
He is going to come back.
My wolf assures me, just like Elu and Eligio tried to. I believe that he is going to come back, I mean, there is no doubt that he would but I just want him to come back and I want things to go back to the way there were.
I close my eyes on the floor, with my hands still covering my face as I drift off waiting for him to come back.
***************
I hear the shuffling of keys and that is what wakes me up, even before the door opens. I sit up because his scent becomes stronger. He is here.
I stand up before the door opens and the sight, I see in front of me has my eyes open wide from shock and worry. There is blood all over his clothes, like all over. His hands and face as well. He looks at me and I see the guilt on his face. He didn’t want me to be here.
Which just tells me that this is not his blood.
Is this Lenny’s blood?
“Why are you here?” he asks immediately.
Now I know for a fact that he didn’t want me to be here.
“Why is there blood all over you,’’ I run over to him and I start to check his body. He would have healed by now if he was injured, so there is no point even checking him. “Are you okay?’’ I add because I am worried out of my mind. I already know that he has done something to Lenny.
That is the only explanation for all this blood.
“I need to get all these clothes off first and have a shower,’’ he tells me and then tries to walk past me. I am quick to grab his hand because I need us to talk about this. I don’t want him to brush it off like it is nothing. I will not judge him…no matter what.
“Dar, what happened?’’ I ask him calmly; I don’t want to scare him into talking about this.
“It is sorted, you don’t have to worry about anything,’’ he says and shrugs it off like it is nothing. He is not looking at me, he is avoiding my eyes. Which just means that nothing is okay.
“What do you mean?’’
I already know what he is talking about. He doesn’t want to tell me blatantly because he thinks I will judge him or see him as a bad person but I could never see him as a bad person.
“Look Dar, I am not going to judge you, I just want us to talk about what happened. What did you do?’’ I ask him.
Finally, he looks at me and I watch him as he runs his hands through his hair. “I wanted to be better, for you. I wanted to change. I didn’t want to be the guy I was but he wanted to hurt you, he wanted to take you away from me.’’
this is the first time I have ever seen Darrien break down in front of me. Like, all I see is regret in his eyes. He doesn’t have to say anything. I already know what he has done without words.
I don’t hate him.
I am not upset with him because I know that he would have had a good reason.
I already know that he killed Lenny and I don’t have any problems with it.
I trust him. I pull him into my arms and he stays there. He doesn’t cry, I feel his breathing as I hold him against me.
I need to be better for him.
I need to be a good mate.
I don’t know how I am going to do that but I need to try.
He can’t shoulder it all on his own.
I won’t let him.